Aran @aran@mania.systems
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Joined Aug 2020
Shitposting NSFWness with implied scat I guess? INCLUDES AN IMAGE YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
It has become a communal effort with some irl friends to come up with ideas to upset ex with as he told me my art was bad because no anime girl titties.
Today I fuckin' drew Femme KFC Colonel pooping out Chicken Drumsticks wearing only red and white stripy thigh highs...
(Yes the Japanese is incorrect. I accidentally skipped a couple of characters and a friend said it was funnier incorrect and I don't speak Japanese so I'll take her word for it.)
FINALLY GOT APPROVED FOR EMDR.
Small flood incoming as I share some commissioned stuff.
sui, meds, angst, mental health, christmas, covid
At this rate my Christmas dinner is gonna be ~84g of naproxen, ~1.2g of amitriptyline, and whatever alcohol I can wash it down with. x) #ChristmasIsCancelled.
Anyone know if there's like... Some kind of app... That will just send a horrifically painful feedback loop on a phonecall? I have had the same fake insurance company phoning me about a car accident that never happened for a year now. I'm already on the Do-Not-Call list. I've asked them to remove me and they immediately hang up. You have to claim you've been in an accident to even get through to a human to ask for that much. Company name changes every time. Never a real company, nothing on Companies House. Phone number spoofed, changes every time. So unable to predict or block.
Have reported to ICO but not really much that can go on to trace.
My only remaining option is to find a way to make it in their interests to stop calling me.
My cat isn't well. I can't afford the bloodtests to find out what is wrong. Dknfnsnnnddkej I am ｉｎａｄｅｑｕａｔｅ.
Is it me or is "cringe" mostly just a way to shame people (who are often either young or neurodivergent or both) for having any kind of emotional intensity or enjoyment that is greater than the status quo?
Obviously this has a dire effect on younger people's ability to emotionally develop in a healthy way.
And causes people to feel like they need to mask those interests to the point where they can no longer adequately express them, further isolating them from anyone.
And obviously disproportionately affects many oppressed people over those with privilege.
And further reinforces the idea that it's only ok to be yourself if "yourself" conforms to a rigid set of parameters.
And often conforms to standards that enforce the exploitation of finance (a lot of nerd culture becoming significantly more widely accepted and catered to the masses when it became more noticably profitable) or encourages people to produce profit for someone else.
Perhaps I'm thinking too hard about it but "cringe" seems like bullshit to me. Let people enjoy things.
Tonight I discovered what battle axe bisexual means and I am now changing my sexuality from pansexual to "everyone except those fucks."
Flashing image.
Trying to replicate what the black flashes I keep getting look like. IDK if it's an aura migraine or what because there's no pain, just really fucking irritating.
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/618204625220141096/783500839351877642/migraine_flashes.gif
I'm not crytyping, my keyboard is apparently shitting itself. 
Suicide
I swear to fucking God the only thing that ever stands between me and suicide isn't even the risk of failure. It's the risk of having to ensure every sanctimonious lecturing dismissive sadistic wank fucking cunt that comes with failure and I swear to fucking Christ if I could just take them all out with me I fucking would.
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Joined Aug 2020
